Finding What's Essential In Your Life
With seemingly endless commitments and demands on our time and attention, it can often feel like we’re coasting through life—meeting to meeting, extracurricular to extracurricular, assignment to assignment. There are so many people, businesses, and news outlets vying for our attention.
Everything feels pressing and important. But is it? Are all the tasks, information, responsibilities, and events in your life actually serving your big picture or are they detracting or distracting from what is truly essential to you? If it’s more the latter, finding what’s truly essential in your life can help make you the author of your own life, because as Greg McKeown says in his book Essentialism: The Disciplined Pursuit of Less, “If you don’t prioritize your life, someone else will.” McKeown offers some deep insights into how to become an essentialist. Here are just a few:
Discern the vital few from the trivial many: When looking at your life, ask tough questions and make your habits or “opportunities” that arise pass a rigorous test before moving forward. Our knee-jerk reaction is often just to say “yes” to every seemingly good thing that comes our way. Begin by weeding out the good from the essential by asking questions like:
What are my goals?
Does this activity align with them?
Do I feel deeply inspired by this?
Am I a definite yes? If not, it’s a no.
2. Cutting out the trivial: We must realize we cannot do it all. There will and must be trade-offs. Once you’ve discerned what is not essential and what you’re willing to trade, then have the courage to say “no” to the things that don’t align with your goals, contribution, and bigger picture. It will take courage to say no to a boss, a spouse, a friend, or an organization. McKeown reminds us that saying “no” often means trading popularity for respect.
3. Remove obstacles and make execution effortless: Determine what you’re really trying to achieve by asking yourself, “How will I know when I’m done?” Then ask, “What are all the obstacles standing between me and getting this done?” Make a list of these obstacles, then ask, “Which of these obstacles, if removed, would make the majority of the other obstacles disappear?” Tackle each obstacle one-by-one, but begin with the biggest obstacle.
4. Celebrate small wins: Set small goals and celebrate each win, no matter how big or small. Progress is progress!
This is just a very small summary of McKeown’s book, which is definitely worth a read. The way of the essentialist is all about stopping us “majoring in minor activities” and starting to live at our highest level of contribution and fulfillment. Here’s to finding what’s essential and bravely pursuing it!